35 thoughts on “Rory’s Story”

  1. If anybody cares to cast their minds back far enough to remember the ABC situational tv show where they had a Homophobic waitress in a diner?…

    One of the two mums in that show, is also one of the two mums in this video!

    1. What a coincidence, I just saw that yesterday!

      edit: er, no actually I didn’t I got mixed up.

  2. In America, there is what is called a “Durable Power of Attorney”. Elsewhere it is called “Enduring Power of Attorney”. It allows one to make any and all decisions on behalf of the grantor as if they were that person them self until the grantor dies.

    It is a very powerful legal document and anyone in these positions in life, such as portrayed in this video, should make sure they have one drawn up by their attorney. This would put to rest most of the bullshit the gays dream up about these situations which amounts to nothing more than propaganda.

    You should also have a proper will drawn up by an attorney and keep it up to date to reflect your most current wishes regarding what happens to your estate after your death.

    1. A durable power of attorney is not valid in many states when it relates to same-sex partners, at least it’s not in Michigan. So its not bullshit that gays dream up, it’s reality. And as a legal beagle you should know that. If you were my dog I probably would swat you with the compiled law that shows same-sex couples as an exclusive group. I mean in theory you are right. If they were hetero common law .. but please do your research. Citings available upon request.

      1. It is irrelevant who the person is who has durable power of attorney as long as he is over 18 years of age. All states recognize this document and if someone tells you otherwise, call the Attorney General’s office and report them.

        You better stick to swatting your dog Junior!

        1. sorry but you are wrong – at least as it relates to the state of michigan. we have been working for years to get it changed. and that is just that.

          1. Junior50MI, it is you who is wrong. I have just consulted the State Bar of Michigan and in your state you can name any person to make all of your medical decisions using the “durable power of attorney”. You can also appoint someone to handle all your financial affairs with a “durable power of attorney for finances”.

            The Michigan Bar web site is clear: “Any person age 18 or older is eligible; you can appoint your spouse, an adult child, a friend, or other individual. You should choose someone you trust, who can handle the responsibility, and who is willing to serve.”

            You can also have your attorney write what is called an “advance directive” The Michigan Bar states: “An advance directive is a written document in which you specify what type of medical care you want in the future, or who you want to make decisions for you, should you lose the ability to make decisions for yourself.”

            This couldn’t be clearer and it is the same throughout the USA. I urge you to stop spreading false statements. I am not going to reply any further to you since anyone listening to your falsehoods is putting himself directly in harm’s way. An attorney would be the competent authority in this regard, not some buffoon writing on this forum.

            www(dot)michbar(dot)org/elderlaw/adpamphlet(dot)cfm

            1. I agree Charlie you should consult a competent attorney, are you one? Should you be giving legal advice, I can claim stupidity because I am not. I only know what happened to me in the state of Michigan and as it relates to my case. As a gay man, I take offense at your original comment saying “this would put to rest most of the bullshit the gays dream up about these situations which amounts to nothing more than propaganda.” – that to me sound very homophobic, and then you are right you shouldn’t believe what buffoon right on this topic… unless they are an attorney.. with standing.

            2. Maybe most of the queers who run afoul of the law, as you seem to have, would be better off if they consulted an attorney BEFORE they get into trouble.
              I am not offering legal advice. Several times I mentioned that people should consult with their attorney on these matters and I quoted your own Michigan Bar Association with regard to the situation regarding “Durable Powers of Attorney” which offer one of the best legal protections that faggots can avail themselves of.

              You are the one who said “Citings available upon request” and yet have failed to provide anything but your own prejudice which is a complete fiction. You sound like so many of the other tacky queens who are bitter about their own failings yet insist on blaming others for their plight.

            3. I’m not from the US and I don’t know the laws and everything. What I do know is that this “durable power of attorney” thing seems quite complicated, also if you need to have a lawyer to help you with theses sorts of things, you probably know that lawyers are not free. This whole thing is making gay couples go through alot more trouble than straight couples to have the exact same rights. I don’t know if you think it’s fair, but I don’t.

            4. @Eros91,
              In this game, there is no free lunch. Hopefully you will learn that by arming yourself with good legal advice from a competent authority you will SAVE money in the long run… in Canada, in the USA, or anywhere.

              “Justice? You get justice in the next world, in this world you have the law.” – William Gaddis

            5. Thank you for showing some common sense, Eros91. Some of us are not that rich to get an attorney services, yet somehow we consider ourselves to be real citizens who have the right to be protected by the law. It may be hard to understand for some US dick-heads rich bastards, I know. Those who think poor people deserve a miserable life, no matter what, and wonder why 3/4th of the world hates them and are ready to applaud to the coming fall of their empire.
              American dream, they say. Talk about a laughing stock… They can drown with their irrational fear of socialism, for all I care. If they knew History, the would know arrogance precedes humiliation.

              Sorry for the hard speech, but I just can’t stand people like Charlie, speaking out of their ass, with no empathy nor compassion whatsoever with anyone but themselves.

            6. @Thomas,
              What has this become a competition to see who can be the most ignorant? Yes, America is in a state of collapse. And also, the EU along with its Euro are near collapse right now in case you haven’t noticed. There is total chaos in the EU right now. These issues have nothing to do with nationalism which is a kind of sickness that wore out its usefulness centuries ago.

              And yes, Thomas, I have no empathy nor compassion for people who deliberately become victims of their own stupidity.

              In comment # 17, below, by “ben” who had the sense to look into what I had stated, he has learned that one can write his own “Durable Power of Attorney” for medical cases for free by downloading forms from the site he has made reference to. Using an attorney is best, but if you cannot afford one OR cannot find an attorney who will do this for free for you (there are legal sources that do “pro bono” work) then that at least gives you something to work with.

              If you depend on what most people call “common sense” you end up screwed. Arm yourself with credible information to protect yourself from the cruel world we have been born into. And as Rimbaud said to Verlaine, “Stop Whining”.

            7. Charlie,
              I don’t need to engage you on the merits or otherwise of your arguements.
              You give your hand away with your comments, “the bullshit the gays dream up” and “Maybe most of the queers who run afoul of the law”.
              By such unnecessary provocations you become ridiculous in our eyes.
              I don’t consider anything ridiculous persons say as anything but ridiculous statements.
              Go away now you hateful bastard, you have nothing to offer us.

            8. @David Stewart
              Maybe once, a long time ago there was such as thing as solidarity among gays. That time is long since gone. There is now a “gay agenda” which excludes huge numbers of people who once thought of themselves as “gay”. I am one of these latter. I am so disgusted by what I see today that when asked, I no longer say I am “gay”. I am a “queer”, “cocksucker”, deviant son-of-a-bitch, but please don’t think I’m “gay”. Sidney Smith has had rants on his own site to this same end, and I am in complete agreement with him.

              If you would like a response about my feelings, please watch this video by Chris Crocker who expresses my sentiments exactly and precisely. You can Google it by name “Chris Crocker – Eat My Cornhole! (The Sims 2 version)”

              Or go to it directly here www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=MdjYsu2-f-g

              Ta-ta David Stewart

            9. David Stewart
              Your a quite misguided, even mad, if you think that you speak for all the Milkboy readers. I seek out and enjoy a variety of viewpoints, in fact, especially those that differ from my own. It is how I learn.
              Peter

    2. Dear Legal Beagle:

      I am a man married to a woman, one of those “traditional marriages” you may have heard about. My parents are elderly with my father now particularly becoming ever more frail — he is in a “skilled care facility”, fancy words for nursing home.

      My brother and sister and I all made sure my parents have all the proper legal documents; Durable Power of Attorney, Health Care Proxy, General Power of Attorney… there were more of them which I can’t remember.

      But the point is that my parents went to a qualified and recommended lawyer and executed all the kinds of documents that might be needed for us children to be able to make decisions for them and manage their assets and affairs when the time came. One of those documents was indeed that “Durable Power of Attorney” you mentioned.

      My experience in trying to use the legal cover of these documents? Terrible! Yes, all parties are SUPPOSED to understand these documents and respect them, but far too many don’t know any more than the hospital “policy” and are afraid to make any decisions. We’ve had to do things like threaten to bring the matter to the attention of the Hospital Risk Manager in order to get access and answers which we were due.

      That’s the story for us folks who are actual next of kin. A same-sex couple with no marriage? I know it must be worse for them.

      I live in Rhode Island where gay man named Mark S. Goldberg was married to a guy who died, and Mark had a months-long battle to convince state authorities to release to him the body of his deceased partner. His request was rejected because they “were not legally married or blood relatives.”

      Now, Legal Beagle, before you go shouting “Durable Power of Attorney!”, listen to the details: This is from the Providence Journal:

      “Goldberg said he tried to show the police and the state medical examiner’s office “our wills, living wills, power of attorney and marriage certificate” from Connecticut, but “no one was willing to see these documents.” He said he was told the medical examiner’s office was required to conduct a two-week search for next of kin, but the medical examiner’s office waited a full week before placing the required ad in a newspaper. And then when no one responded, he said, they “waited another week” to notify another state agency of an unclaimed body.
      After four weeks, he said, a Department of Human Services employee finally “took pity on me and my plight — reviewed our documentation and was able to get all parties concerned to release Ron’s body to me.”

      See, Legal Beagle? Goldberg had a POWER OF ATTORNEY and he even had an actual MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE from the state of Connecticut (which Rhode Island didn’t recognize), yet it took him months to get the body released and put his loved one to rest.

      So, Legal Beagle, the next time you want to write on some blog about, “the bullshit the gays dream up about these situations which amounts to nothing more than propaganda”, I want you to first remember the plight of Mark Goldberg. I want you to picture yourself telling him to his face that his difficulty getting his partner’s body so he could have some dignity to hold a funeral was just some “bullshit he dreamed up.”

      The only way to really resolve the situations in life, such as portrayed in this video, is to have all states recognize full marriage equality for all.

      1. Too long a statement to address properly here, Glen. I know about all these issues that you mention and also how to overcome them. I deal with these exact same situations and learned very quickly how to deal with bureaucrats and authority.

        Nor is marriage a blanket solution. Marriage in the modern world is an all but failed institution. How many people simply live together today without the benefit of marriage even if they are straight? How many kids are born out of wedlock and brought up by distant relatives or even unrelated people? We either correct these problems for everyone, or not at all. In the meantime there are steps you can take to be fully prepared. You have already outlined several important ones. Your problem as far as I can determine from what you have written is that you didn’t know how to follow through.

        Your failing is in not knowing how to strike fear into the hearts of these buffoons. If you sit there pleading with idiots you will get nowhere even if you are only asking for the rights that the law now provides for you. Your “rights” are all but worthless unless you know how to protect and defend them in the face of sometimes overwhelming ignorance.

        I must tell you that the idea of going to a “Hospital Risk Manager” to solve problems such as yours is comical. They are in cahoots with the very system that failed you.

        What several here need is an education in how to live in the modern world and how not to be used as a door mat by those who should be serving your interests, and not thwarting them.

        Quite simply, people don’t pull this shit with me. As Boyd McDonald said, I may eat shit, but I don’t take any!

        1. Doesn’t anyone remember when the term “gay” referred to being happy…. ? and life, such as it is… will go on…

        2. Well, Mr. Beagle, as you said there are far too many issues to be dealt with in a terse forum such as this. But in short:

          1. You refused to address my conclusory assertion, namely, that it isn’t “bullshit” that “gays make up” — it is real-life circumstance that state-recognized marriage would in fact address, much to your chagrin. With marriage equality, many people wouldn’t have to deal with bureaucrats at all because talking to a same-sex spouse or their kids would be routine.

          2. Invoking the “Hospital Risk Manager” got me exactly what I wanted — so I have no idea what you think is “comical.” Results are hardly something to laugh at. Maybe that job description is different in your area.

          3. Of course nothing is a “blanket solution” to anything, but recognition of marriages would carry many issues quite a long distance.

          4. I’m glad you are so totally awesome and brilliant and know “how to deal with bureaucrats and authority” and know about “steps you can take to be fully prepared” and that you “know how to follow through.” That’s not the point. The point is that a married couple would not have to be as fantastic and brilliant as you, they would just have to be recognized as married.

      2. Glen, tell Mark Goldberg to forget the dead, and to concentrate on the living. If he had more than one lover he wouldn’t have invested so much of his emotion in only one person.

        “Love of only one person is a barbarity, for it is exercised at the expense of all others.” -Nietzsche

        Nietzsche akbar!

  3. Well this just goes to show that Eire isn’t the only country, it’s so prevalent around the world it isn’t even funny. I would be interested to know which ABC TV show you are referring to. But it’s sad, we live with this everyday.
    Sometimes life is just sad!

    1. Don’t call us Éire, we’re called Ireland. Unless you’re actually speaking Irish. You wouldn’t refer to Germany as Deutschland when speaking English. No Irish person uses the term Éire except when speaking Irish, nor does any international body. Officially, Ireland is always called Ireland.

      Sorry to rant, great video, and great to see it spread, this isn’t the only international site I’ve seen it on.

      1. Bhuel tá sé brónach, a cheapann tú gur féidir leat é a úsáid ach focal má tá sé i gcomhthéacs an teanga a thabhairt?

      2. Agreed. When Ireland became “independent” and Divided by the “Brutish” Government, on 6th December 1922, it took the name, Irish Free State, which it changed, I believe to Eire, (Ireland) on 29th December 1937, finally becoming the Republic of Ireland on 18th April 1949. (It’s true Independence Day).

        Stephen.

        Saor Alba agus Eireann.

  4. Wow I think all the talk about powers of attorney misses the point. This is about a son wanting the doctor to talk to him about his I mother’s health i.e. how is my mother doing and being denied simple basic information because he is not her child by birth or adoption. This is about a boy who has spent his life with his mother who is now being treated like a stranger because he is not the related to the patient by birth or adoption. In most cases even a stepchild would be given this basic info by the doctor.
    Before I stop, I asked someone if Durable Powers of attorney are legal in Michigan. I was told to look it up so I did and they are. Perhaps more importantly you can do one for free.
    The link is below. I also look up several other states so I am now going to make what I think is a reasonable assertion.

    If you type in the words durable Power of attorney for heath care and the name of a state you will get a free form for that State and all the instructions you need to do a free power of attorney for health care. Have a great day.
    http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/aha/umlegal02.htm

    1. Ben I was only explaining what happened to me, in my own situation. I did not mean to inferr anything more than that. I might have said it wrong and Charlie made sure he corrected me, after hurling an insult or two. But that is neither here nor there. To the collective masses reading this, I apologize – and as for the the citings Charlie I will gladly show you the death certificate, he is listed as single, and we were together for 5 years. So… please except my apology people.

      1. You lived with someone for 5 years and you think that gives you legal entitlements? I’ve lived with several people for much longer than that, one for over 20 years, and I would hardly expect that to confer any legal rights. That is EXACTLY the reason we have things like “wills”, various kinds of “power of attorney”, “advance directives” et cetera.

        You have a death certificate for some dude you lived with for 5 years which listed him as “single”? Well what the fuck did you expect it to list him as? That’s the “citing” you have available that you mentioned early in this thread? You are even more delusional than I had first guessed!

        1. what is your fucking problem, I try to apologize – maybe you need to fucking relax, I am just relaying my personal experience, you don’t have to agree, you may thing I am a jerk, okay fine, but now let’s give it a rest and move on. Nobody is going to be able to convince me that a durable power of attorney would have made any difference, and nobody is going to be able to convince you any different to your viewpoint, just let it rest okay?

  5. This is realy very funny. children must have father (man) and mother (woman) and all another man+man, woman+woman, only father, only mother, dog+woman, alien+man and so on it’s simply abnormal. So stop washing our minds about this kind of bullshit

  6. As I see it, children don’t need a mother AND a father. They can have a single parent, or two mothers, or even two fathers. All they need is love and guidance. I have two mothers, and I seem to be doing just fine. I hold down a regular job, volunteer, and more.

    As for this video, I have yet to face anything like this, but I pray if I ever have to face it, I can stand beside my moms and remain strong. (Here’s to 22+ years moms!)

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